When We All Get To Heaven

From BiVo by Hugh Halter

The scriptures say that we might be told, “Well done, my good and faithful servant,’ which also suggests that Jesus can also give us the thumbs down for how we had lived life and managed the tasks he had ordained for us to do.
 I’ve often thought about this moment and I’ve decided I don’t care f Jesus says, “Halter, you were awesome, the best one I’ve ever seen.” I’d settle for, “Halter, you were a blast to watch!” I’m not looking for an A-rating, but I certainly don’t want to have him say, “Hugh…I modeled true leadership, I gave you clear instructions to make disciples or apprentices of my kingdom, but intend you wasted your time managing church services, consumer Christians, and worrying about all sorts of things I never asked you to do….All I asked you to do was make people who looked, smelled, and acted like I did.

This paragraph has been in my mind for the last two weeks, and it has taken me two weeks to wrap my mind around it, come to grips with it, and to gather my thoughts enough to write about it.

Then today I read this in Restless by Jennie Allen:

But I can tell you that at the end of our lives, when we stand before God, these are the only things that will matter: 
Did I do what God wanted me to be doing while I was here?
Did I complete the works he had for me?
Did I fulfill my purposes in my generation?
So instead of waiting until we’re standing in God’s throne room, let’s work backward and ask those questions now. Let’s live them today. Not for a salvation that can be earned, but in response to a God who built and rescued us as a part of his great purpose. 

I’ve often thought about seeing Jesus. It is a wonderfully sweet thought. However, my thoughts have always stopped there. I’ve never really considered what he will say to me. I am a little afraid of what that will be at this point. I think overall I have lived an incredibly selfish life. I have allowed my insecurities and fears to hold me back, never understanding that in my weaknesses He is strong. I have been consumed with things inside the church instead of outside of it.

I am no longer satisfied to live my life so that it is centered around Sunday morning, focused on myself, and full of excuses and fears. I am ready to tell God, “Finally, I am all in, even the parts of me that are afraid and even my many weaknesses.” Honestly, though, saying that makes me a little bit nervous. Not about what he is going to ask of me, but rather that I will fail to do it, reverting back to my old ways and habits.

However, I know that deep in my soul I long for more, more than what I’ve always done, more than a life of ease that makes sense not only to me but to those around me.

When I get to heaven and stand in front of Jesus I want him to say that I completed the works he had for me to do, that I loved as he loved, and that I did what he asked of me without excuses. I want to be found faithful.

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